Ever since my Mom has come to live with my family (December 18, 2009 will be one year) she has been conspiring and sneaking and deceitful behind our backs.
She says my husband and I are the ones that have gone behind her back instead. It is impossibly to note all of the things my husband has done for my Mom and my brother too. He only wishes the best for them and wants peace and harmony in our family. My Mom just chooses to side with her loser son, instead of her daughter and son-in-law who show their love for her in healthy ways.
My Mom basically does not want to lose her house. That would be understandable if there were not so many factual reasons against it making sense:
- The house is upside-down in a loan (it is worth less than is owed on it)
- My Mom does not live in the property and has been ordered by a court of law not to ever move back there again
- The house is occupied by a rental tenant - my drug addicted brother
- The family, including my drug-addicted brother and (I sure thought) my Mom agreed April 21, 2009 that Brian would be moving out of the house when my Mom came to live with us. This choice was what was best for everyone, not a shocking twist.
My Mom wants the house to be 'willed' to Brian (my brother); she says that's how my Dad wanted it and that's how she wants it. She has been declared incompetent but she wants to change her will to clarify this, and also remove me from receiving anything at all should she die.
Brian, the aforementioned loser brother, has only taken from my mom and abused the relationship he has with her. He is a manipulative co-dependent, addictive enabler who is the worse thing for my mom possible.
The two of them speak on the phone 2-3 times per day about how horrible it is for her to live here. She has a gorgeous room and beautiful furniture that she picked out. She has a brand new HDTV that she also chose which matches her furniture. She lives in a one-level entry and has one step from where her car is parked to where she steps inside. All of her meals are made for her, no requirements by her, and made to her tastes and liking. She sees doctors and specialists regularly and her medication is regulated better than it ever has been.
Despite everything she does have, including an opportunity to have a close relationship with her two grandsons, she hates living here and hates my husband and me. She is disrespectful of my husband's headship. She even refuses to wash herself properly or regularly. I really think she does this non-washing to punish us. She goes up to a month or more without showering.
The ways that she and Brian have been sneaking around are numerous. She lies easily and regularly. She has gone to an attorney and sought advice from him regarding matters that should only be decided by her legal guardian. She has been sneaking around with the mortgage company because she wants to keep her house and it is not in her best interests to do so; even the attorney has told her this.
S.L.M. 12.10.09
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